The thing that stresses me out the most!
The list really could go on and on but if I must say one thing that stresses me out the most right now... It would have to be MaCee's birth mother! When we were in the hospital she decided that she didn't want to meet us, which we were ok with, if thats what she wanted. I cannot even imagine what was going on in her head, so I wanted her to have the time she needed to grieve. I won't lie as we walked through the hospital halls I secretly hoped we would run into her. I prayed and prayed for her to have peace in her heart and know that her little girl would be loved soooo much by so many people (including her birth family.) When we signed she had decided that she wanted a semi- open adoption, to me this meant that maybe there was a chance that she would be a little part of ours and MaCee's life. In the last 7 months I have sent pictures, a book, letter, to the agency and that is were it has stayed by her choice. It breaks my heart not being able to talk to her, and know how she feels, I feel completely in the dark. I would love to have a relationship with her, and at least let her know that MaCee is doing well. I just wish she could see a little video of MaCee's life, and I think that would help her a little bit, at least I hope it would. So maybe I am just being silly and need to let it go, but it sure does weigh on my mind often!!! If anyone has any suggestions I am open! Also I did not mean to offend anyone by this post so please take it as it is meant... I know that birth mothers are special little angels in our lives, I just wish we could have ours!
Merry Christmas 2016
9 months ago